THIS SANDS OF TIME

In this sands of time

Fall in Love with every strand your kinky hair,

Fall in Love with every scar on your body,

Fall in Love with that exquisite curve that forms when you smile ,it’s a piece of art ,

Fall in Love with your whole mesmerizing physic

Be head over heels in love with you,

You owe a lot to yourself,

You are your own best friend,

Your body will never shrug,give you a cold shoulder, ghost you or walk out on you when you are entangled in a web of trouble or tragedy

Love yourself the way you want to be Loved by another,

Fall in Love with you till you sweep yourself off of your own feet.(Damn wharristhis🀣🀣🀣)

Don’t succumb to your haunting past,

Don’t let the society wrap you around it’s index finger

Don’t let people’s opinions thwart your progress ,everyone is entitled to one,

Don’t let this sands of time make you feel worthless,

It’s a changing world ,conform at your own risk

A world full of plastic smiles all over social media,

A world where the art of drawing perfectly shaped eyebrows ,bigger chest,flat tummy,curvy hips, enormous ass literally mean you have everything

It’s an era filled with filters and angles,

Everything is kinda scripted and edited,

No one wants to show their real personalities,

It’s like a masquerade ball,

People are hiding behind perfectly edited pictures glowing like the stars yet falling into bottomless pits of depression abysmally.

In this generation sanity hangs on a loose thread and you could snap anytime.

In a world full of shutter sounds, Instagram stories, mind blowing memes,

Be authentic

Sis there is only one version of you,

Be gentle with yourself,

Don’t break your neck as you try to catch a glimpse of people’s lives,

You don’t have to bend till your back breaks as you try to afford long wigs,

You don’t have to hurt your pretty fingers as you try to look good with stickons that can’t let you gnaw on a piece of chicken peacefully,

You don’t have to change the color of your skin to please the world,it’s a treacherous world and it will use this against you one day,

It’s not like you are a plastic bag,you can’t keep drifting towards every direction in this sands of time.

You are not a house of cards and can’t keep crumbling and caving in due to waves of change

Live your life.

Perfection is a disease of a Nation,

You are fucking pretty babe😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

You are a masterpiece,

Your whole body is an art gallery,

Your like an empty canvas,

Paint your canvas with beautiful stuff,

Stuff like self care, solitude, priorities and have funπŸ˜‹

Pitch in colourful hues ,few highlights and contours ,keep shading and blending with the appropriate stuff.

Be happy with yourself

Heey lovelies ,it’s been eons and eons of years since I last posted.I have been on a hiatus for a very long time and now am back like I never left.I am very poor at keeping promises but I will be posting consistently.I hope this was insightful too😍😍😍

Show your girl some love ,like, share, comment

Bye!!!!

the night we met.

Take me back to the night we met,

At that beautiful bridge,

 The night sky was filled with a million stars,

we counted those stars and making sweet wishes upon them lying on the grass ,grass wet with dew

With the moon so large and bright ,i kept clinging onto your arm whispering,”hey i feel like someone is watching us from across the street”

You held me by my waist,looked deep into my eyes like you were searching for something,Something like a hidden treasure,and suddenly burst into bubbles of laugher,a rich unforgettable laughter that still echoes in my mind,

And you said,”baby ,dont be afraid am your knight,nobody is gonna hurt you and my armour is not only shining but also dazzling and who cares.”

See“,you said,,and you started waltzing ,spinning and standing on your toes ,,,oh my ,,”you are such a great dancer,like a ballerina “i said. you scoffed and said in a sweet voice,”I will show you more if you start walking come on princess”

Take me back to that night ,when my palms were so clammy and it felt awkward holding your perfect hands but you didnt care at all.we walked with our fingers entwining ,your cologne was so sweet and that moment felt so surreal ,magical,more like a dream.

We made a stop at the club,you looked so cute under those green,blue,red neon lights  that seemed to be dancing everywhere and spinning around the room.

We drank too much that night.we took countless tequila shots,chugged glasses of whiskey down our throats like hungry wolves ravaging on a piece of fat meat.we took endless selfies.There was a band playing some hard rock song , more like punk and we danced like crazy people jumping up and down like stupid ten year olds,moving our heads back and forth till i felt like my neck was on the verge of breaking.

Then we danced a slow dance with the song the night we met by lord huron blaring from the stereos.it was so emotional and tears started to form in my eyes and you held me so close that i could feel your minty  breath fanning my face,i could feel your heartbeat and i swear your heart was beating so erratically.you kissed me and i kissed you back,we kissed ,long kisses ,like there was no one else in the room.

We played pool and i beat you ,you stared at me surprised because you thought no girl can beat you.we played darts and i still beat you because i hit the bulls eye like baaaaaam!!!! Your mouth went agape and you were in awe,i bet in your mind you were like ,,daaamn this girl is terrific,daaamn,this girl is fucking great…………We sang at the karaoke and played acapella using our feets and fingers as beats,damn so brilliant.

We shared a ciggarette as we took one more drink and headed out.our clothes smelled whiskey and smoke as the cold,nippy night air filled our lungs.you walked me home and i took you inside.we aΕ₯e more crips on the couch ,poured more glasses of my favourite wine.we talked,

Talked,

Talked the night away,

Talked about our dreams and i told you one of my dreams is to ride through hollywood sunset in california ,i told you i wanted to write scripts for movies and see the stages where movies are shot ,the warner bros,the dolby,marvel studios,cue ,,,the song california dreaming  by sia

Listened to soft rock music,we had so much fun that night .we passed out on the couch like stupid kids.it was a perfect night and i will carry the memories of these night everywhere i go.i wish we took polaroids because i would carry those memories on paper and stick them on the wall beside my bed.

Take me back to the night we met

So have not been posting alot lately but i will be updating as much as i can.like share and comment,bye!!!


this is you and me

this is you breaking me little by little,

 Piece by piece

To bits

like  tiny shards of glass

this is you belittling me  from dawn to dusk

this is you wrecking havoc in my fatigued and depressed mind

this is you killing me with your stupid accusations

and all i wanna do is run away from you

before i swim and unfortunately drown in your miserable life

so this is me walking away from toxic people like you

this is me screaming at the top of my lungs releasing all your bullshit

this is me walking away limping before you make me a cripple

this is me spreading my wings so i can fly before you clip my wings and put me in a  dingy cage 

this is me crawling and slithering away from you before you put mental and physical shackles in my life

this is me saying goodbye to irrelevant stuff ,negativities and saying hello to positivity 

this is me embracing power and progress

this is me clinking glasses of champagne with my inner self  ,

mumbling sweet words like 

to new beginnings

to new friendships

to happiness

to authenticity

to positivitiesπŸ’ŸπŸ’Ÿ

 So this is my first post this year, like ,comment and share 

I do share my work in social media platforms such as

Facebook @ assylem kesh

Twitter@ melsajoy

Instagram@ assylem kesh

Instagram@ dove girl 1059

Till next tym,,bye,,πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜πŸ’ŸπŸ’Ÿ



My constant

You are my constant,

You are more than a feeling,

You are something i cant live without

You are a drug and am addicted to you

No rehab can fix my addiction

You are my missing puzzle

Now i feel complete,

You gave me attention when nobody was paying attention

You turned my doubts to hope 

You made me see light in darkness

You are perfect even with your flaws

You made me tear down all the walls that i had built so high

I love the way you hold on to everything so tightly like you are kissed by a higher power coz you dont give up

You are the favourite part of me

You are a perfect melody

Stay with me till we are old and senile and grey

I know this love will still exist in our second life

We will love each other even as ghosts

My constant,my significant other ,my forever person

MY OLD MAN


He was tall ,dark and handsome,

His eyes were dark and penetrating,

His hair jet black and soft like old leather

Isn’t that the definition of male beauty??

Yeah 

My father fancied wearing leather boots and hats which made him look like a cowboy except that he did not have a horse .i love boots too ,i think i picked  that from him .Ooh and i also have his hair,soft and long .

Country music ,brightened his moods as well as swahili songs .He listened to dolly partons songs every now and then.His cars’ stereo was ever blaring with the song,”jolene,jolene,jolene ,please dont take away my man”or the likes of,embe dodo ,embe dodo limelala mchangani.Whenever i hear this songs ,memories of my old man flash in my mind .

He loved black cofee,he preffered it hot and strong.I think that his cofee kept his mind working and eyes wide open because he was a night owl and an early bird,he slept in the wee small hours and woke up at the crack of dawn.

My old man loved watching action movies starred by actors like arnold schwerzniger,jean claude,jackie chan,bruce lee.He was my dj afro,because whenever we were watching he was there to explain everything and what will happen next,,such a spoiler😬😬😬😬.i love watching movies too,that,i got from him too.Damn,i got so many of his characters😁😁

Dad worked in the  kenyan army.He looked so strong,authoratative and confident in his combat suit .Actually he looked like captain tom chandler in the series movie,,the last ship.Beneath his combat suit ,lurked a gentleman ,a father,a husband and a guardian angel to many

He tamed dogs ,doves and cats.His dogs were so brave and would snarl angrily at any stranger .He trained them in a civilized manner ,they would not nibble on any other meat stake unless given by him.His doves perched on his shoulders,spreading their wings with bliss and joy as he fed them with corn and millet.

My dad always said that my witty brain matched his brains.yes i made stellar performance in my exams and all he said was that i am so bright “just like him.

He loved his bottle.Scotch blended whisky ,gin,martini..He was an enigma .so unpredictable.He had an answer to every question,a solution to every situation.My old man was funny at the same time ,he used to send each of us red rose flowers during valentine day.upto date,for the two decades of my life,I have never recieved flowers from anyone apart from dad.


I loved him so much,he believed in me .He talked highly about me and made me feel good about myself ,he was my friend ,mentor not until cancer knocked in.it started gnawing at his flesh without an iota of mercy.

His body became frail,He was flinching and writhing in pain.His skin darkened and eyes sunk deeper and my strong old man was now so thin and his skin stretched tightly over the bones like sticks.

Death was seducing him with every passing hour.Death was beckoning and winking at him mischieviously.

This brought grief,sorrow and endless tears in my life.I prayed for him with utmost devotion and concentration.I told God to keep him longer and i could not bare watching life seep out of him each day.

At one wild moment i felt so mad at myself because i could do nothing to save him.yes ,nothing .i started making wishes on the stars,started practicing novena,i started fasting and prayed fervently but nothing changed actually he grew worse.My hope did not dim .

I vividly recall that fateful day ,when i came from school and found dread plastered on everyones face,                  all i could hear were wails,silent cries,whispers and my knees grew weak,my throat went dry ,my voice abadoned me ,my stomach dropped and my fears were being confirmed by the look on their faces.yes my hero kissed the world goodbye.my life had gone blue

I cried myself to sleep and for a moment i wished i could sleep forever because i could not bear living without my hero.i curled into a fetal ball wishing he stayed longer,atleast i could have held his hand during his last moments.

But now that you are gone dad,i know you are seated among the angels.if you could see me now dad,you would be proud of me,you would pat me on the back because i have achieved alot that would put a smile on your face.

My hero,guardian angel ,may you forever rest in peace and today i decided to pen down  memories of you .i love you so much dad to infinity and even in my second life time i will still love you and i miss you so much .❀❀❀❀❀❀

    Disillusioned


    I hate waking up everyday to live an empty life,

    Chasing blurry dreams,

    Expectations too high,

    Dwindling hopes

    Doubts escalating

    Faith fading from my heart

    Pools of tears forming in my eyes

    Fear of the unknown,

    When your good isn’t good enough,

    Making wishes on the stars ,

    Sleepless nights,

    Second guessing ,

    Aching emptiness in my heart,

    Loud voices in my mind,

    Dying inside,

    When all colourful things turn to a shade of black

    Waiting,

    Wanting ,

    Hoping,

    I want to give up ,

    But

    I was born a warrior and a hero,

    Because i have got an elastic heart,

    Even the infinity knives cannot scare me,

    And i have a heart of steel

    And i wont give up

    Stars

    Star

    They say we are all made of stardust, but I think some of us were made with more stardust than others

    Today am talking about stars ,not the stars littered in a night sky ,I mean people who are stars

    I was contemplating about how they feel,

    How does it feel to be a renown author

    How does it feel when the song you have written hits all over the world

    How does it feel when you walk around and all you hear is your voice singing blaring from the speaker and your song is legit

    How does it feel when you have millions of people voting you in as the President of any republic

    How does it feel wen a million people have subscribed to your YouTube channel

    How does it feel wen thousands attend your church service just to listen to you preaching

    How does it feel,

    I think it feels so good

    I think its overwhelming

    We are all made of stardust so we can all be stars 

    It starts with believing in yourself and working hard and waiting upon the lord

    You are a star

    If you are reading this you are a star

    You glitter,glimmer,shimmer 



    You are a star ,

    Am a star .

    We are stars

    Please like,comment and share 

    Stay gold

    You

    Am not afraid of the dark,

    Am not afraid of monsters,

    Am afraid of you

    You peering the darkest corners of my life,

    Of you seeing the amount of tears soaked in my pillow,

    Of you knowing my Achilles heel,

    Of you reading my mind,

    Of you seeing the dark paths I tread on everyday ,

    Of you bearing to see all my delusional outbursts from time to time,

    Of you watching me go crazy and getting mad at small things because am soo fucking picky,

    Of you holding me into your mighty arms and watch me change my expression from time to time while am in the middle of my dreams because I fight battles even in my dreams,

    I hate the fact that you will see the scratches on my back and that stray thought will hit your mind and start thinking how scratches got on my back

    I hate that l love you 

    This love will break me

    It will strip me open and bare

    You will connect the dots

    You will read between the lines 

    And you will get to know the real me.

    A letter to my ex


    Dear ex,i hope this letter gets to you soon

    I want to sue you for murder,

    You murdered the little pretty innocent girl ,i once was

    I want to sue you for robbery

    You stole my fragile heart and broke it into a million pieces 

    You stole my pretty smile

    You stole my sanity and  now i deal with delusional outbursts from time to time

    I want to sue you for extortion.

    You blackmailed me ,in that if i had to feel your mighty arms snaked around me,i had to give you a little something.

    I want to sue you for being a liar

    You fed me with honey coated lies 

    I discovered the  ugly truths,

    That left me ,empty and  void like a vacuum,

    That left me utterly flustered ,

    I became a stranger to my self,

    When i stare at the reflection in the mirror, i see a total stranger,a stranger in the mirror,

    You demolished my confidence,

    But a day will come ,when reality will dawn on you

    Yes you killed and created something so dangerous it could kill you now,

    After you attacked my sanity and ripped off my joy

    Tears kept rolling down my face,i sobbed  all night long,bags formed under my eyes,because i had fallen abysmally for you ,

    Time went by,slowly , 

    The endless sobs turned to quivers,

    The quivers turned to heavy breaths 

    The heavy breaths turned to relief,

    My soft heart hardened,

    Realization crept to my heart and mind,

    I accepted fate ,

    I embraced positivity and moved on ,

    And now i wear my scars proudly,

    Walks head high,

    Now you cant melt this heart of iron,

    Because i kill you,

    I kill you with this huge ego of mine,this broad curvy smile that captures everyones heart,i kill you with kindness 

    And will still sue you anyway

    Her


    She has got fire in her soul,

    She glows like the moon in the darkest of nights,

    She is the cool breeze in the hot summer,

    She has the sweetest ,rational words,

    Her voice so soft that it softens the hardest hearts,

    There is something about her laughter,

    A  rich laughter,

    A laughter that dries tears ,

    A laughter that soothes  even the hearts  broken in the worst ways,

    She has got a smile wider than the circumference of the moon 

    A single curve of  her smile dims the glow of the full moon,

     A smile that can light up a thousand Christmas trees,

    Her whole countenance is just mind  numbing,

    😍😍😍😍